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Speaking Softly Makes People Listen



Healing Circle at The Living Well after Baltimore uprising last spring.

*photo credit: Dominic Nell

"I can not hear you when you shout. My soul receives you within a whisper."-Michelle Stafford

So often, when we feel that we are not being heard, we begin to shout in a attempt to control the situation. However, it takes on the opposite effect. Our audience becomes disconnected, or even defensive. When we get to the point of shouting, we have, in fact, lost control of both the situation, and ourselves. Shouting does not have to be in the form of verbal expression. We sometimes act out in other ways. We use social media, emails, and text to get people to just hear us or see our point. Sometimes we shout at one another by way of physical violence. Often times, we are being violent to one another in an attempt to just be heard or seen, and we are not even aware of the traumatization that we are causing to all who are involved. At what point is it ok to violate someone in order to make yourself be seen or heard? What are the alternatives? How can we express ourselves in a meaningful way? How can we heal?

“Raise your words, not voice. It is rain that grows flowers, not thunder.” ― Rumi

It is through practices such as yoga, drumming, dance, and meditation that we are able to tap into the body's innate healing abilities. When we move in a rhythmic way, the body releases physical, spiritual and emotional toxins that have built up in our bodies. We create new cell memories. Stillness may bring peace, but lack of circulation causes blockages and stagnation. Rhythmic movement brings healing, but impulsive unconscious flailing brings about violence and chaos. There must be balance.


Yes, the darkness is necessary for growth. Some of us get stuck in the darkness, because they do not know their own strength. One of my jobs as a yoga teacher/wellness coach is to help you find that strength.

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